I'm not a huge metalhead, or hesher if you will, but I've always had a fondness for it. What I love most about a certain type of metal fan, the ones in Heavy Metal Parking Lot for instance, is their single-minded commitment to the metal lifestyle. From my vantage point, it seems that most headbangers just want to rock and while they may have their preferences any rock'll do. Except of course for candy-ass hair metal.
For last year's metal show, Mothra and I explored the various outlying realms of the metalsphere including, but not limited to, grindcore, stoner metal, viking metal and fantasy metal (my new favorite). While not all were instantly cuddly and lovable, I learned to enjoy almost all of them but the ones I just don't get are black & death metal. I can't even tell them apart. The reason I can't get a handle on these genres is because of the cookie monster vocals featured on every single song by every single band. Good luck telling the difference between Carcass, Cannibal Corpse or Gorgoroth and good luck trying to sing along. It's all throaty, rumbly nonsense and most of the lyrics read like an autopsy report. How do these singers get these voices? Do they gargle acid and broken glass? And it's not just men. There are female vocalists for some of these groups and they sound exactly the same. It's bizarre, creepy, unbelievably samey and I just don't get it. I do, however, get this:
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